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11,282

Saturday, June 19th 2010, 2:09am

This post has been edited 1 times, last edit by "[*HS*] Anti" (Jun 19th 2010, 2:16am)


11,283

Saturday, June 19th 2010, 8:16am

Tochter: "Also Mami, das mit der Befruchtung habe ich jetzt verstanden.
Das Sperma dringt also ins Ei ein, und dadurch entsteht eine neuer Mensch. Wie kommt aber das Sperma dorthin? Musst Du das schlucken?"
Papi im Hintergrund:
"Nein, nur wenn sie ein neues Kleid will..."

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11,284

Saturday, June 19th 2010, 2:03pm

Once upon a time (1/t) pretty little Polly Nomial was strolling across
a field of vectors when she came to the boundary of a singularly large
matrix. Now Polly was convergent, and her mother had made it an
absolute condition that she must never, ever enter such an array
without her brackets on. Polly, however, who had changed her variables
that morning and was feeling particularly badly behaved, ignored this
condition on the basis that it was insufficient, and made her way in
amongst the complex elements.
Rows and columns closed in on her from all sides. Tangents approached
her surface, and she became tenser and tenser. Quite suddenly, two
branches of a hyperbola touched her at a single point. She oscillated
violently, became unstable, lost all sense of directrix, tripped over
a square root that was protruding from the erf, and plunged headlong
down a steep gradient. She was completely divergent by the time she
reached the turning point. When she rounded off once more, she found
herself inverted, apparently alone in a non-euclidean space.
She was being watched, however. That smooth operator, Curly Pi, was
lurking inner product. As his eyes devoured her curvilinear
coordinates, a singular expression crossed his face. He wondered, was
she convergent? He decided to integrate improperly at once.
Hearing a common fraction behind her, Polly rotated and saw Curly Pi
approaching with his lower series extended. She could see at once his
degenerate conic and his dissipative terms, and knew he was
irrational.
"Arcsinh!" she gasped.
"Hey, what's your sine?" he asked. "What a symmetric set of asymptotes
you have!"
"Stay away from me!" she protested. "I haven't got any brackets on!"
"Calm yourself, my dear!" said the smooth operator.. "Your fears are
purely imaginary."
"i, i, ..." she thought, "Perhaps he's not normal, but homologous."
"What order are you?" the brute suddenly demanded.
"Seventeen," replied Polly.
Curly leered, "I suppose you've never been operated upon?"
"Of course not. I'm absolutely convergent!" Polly replied quite
properly.
"Come on," said Curly: "Let's go to decimal place I know of, and I'll
take you to the limit."
"Never!" gasped Polly..
"Abscissa!" he swore a violent oath.
Coshing her over the coefficient with a log until she was powerless,
Curly removed her discontinuities. He stared at her significant
places, and began smoothing her points of inflection. Poor Polly
Nomial! The algorithm method was now her only hope. She felt him
approaching her asymptotic limit. Her convergence would soon be gone
forever. There was no mercy; Curly was a heavy side operator. His
radius squared itself and Polly's loci quivered. He integrated by
parts. He integrated by partial fractions. After he cofactored, he
performed Runge-Kutta on her. He even went all the way around and did
a contour integration. Curly went on operating until he satisfied her
hypotheses, then he exponentiated and became completely orthogonal.
When Polly got home that night, her mother noticed that she was no
longer piecewise continuous, but had been truncated in several places.
But it was too late to differentiate now. As the months went by,
Polly's denominator increased monotonically. Finally, they took her to
L'Hopital and generated a small but pathological function which left
surds all over the place and drove Polly to deviation.

The moral of this tale is: "If you want to keep your expressions
convergent, never allow them a single degree of freedom."
Now that's what I call getting your Mathematical Pundamentals right.

11,285

Saturday, June 19th 2010, 4:22pm

This post has been edited 1 times, last edit by "BoonCrusher" (Jun 19th 2010, 4:23pm)


SiA_Ritter

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11,286

Saturday, June 19th 2010, 7:40pm

Ist zwar alt aber kann man nie genug von kriegen :D
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vt4X7zFfv4k

11,287

Sunday, June 20th 2010, 10:52am

Loriot Comic-Sketch wurde verfilmt
Hier das Original und hier die Real-Verfilmung.

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11,288

Sunday, June 20th 2010, 7:29pm

This post has been edited 1 times, last edit by "AtroX_Worf" (Jun 20th 2010, 7:29pm)


Valheru

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11,290

Sunday, June 20th 2010, 7:50pm

lol

SenF_tari

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11,291

Sunday, June 20th 2010, 8:09pm

Meine Skulptur, meine schöne Skulptur
von Peter Signer

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=35iYo0LOrVI

Irre, einfach irre!

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11,292

Sunday, June 20th 2010, 8:57pm

Ich weiß nicht obs schon gepostet wurde.

BIG TASTY

:D

11,293

Monday, June 21st 2010, 9:27pm


Karikhador

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11,294

Monday, June 21st 2010, 9:52pm

kelsea, die drecksau^^

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11,295

Tuesday, June 22nd 2010, 11:13am

das ist es also!
kOa_Master has attached the following file:
  • Wetter.jpg (89.85 kB - 1,225 times downloaded - latest: Dec 21st 2023, 12:26pm)

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11,296

Tuesday, June 22nd 2010, 11:45am

RE: Neuer Versuch Euch zu erheitern!

Quoted

Original von SenF_Fred
Sagt der Mann zur Frau: Wäre das schön wenn Du jetzt Geil wärst
Antwortet die Frau: Wäre das jetzt Geil wenn Du schön wärst

:D



UND MIR IST ES SCHEISS EGAL WENN DAS JETZT ALT IST  8)



:D

oh man vor langweile habe ich die ersten 4 seiten gelesen
lustige witze waren dabei, auch welche die ich schon kannte

omg und viele witze über türken
was hat einen halbmond und ist wieder nicht bei der WM dabei? :stupid:

This post has been edited 2 times, last edit by "pokerface" (Jun 22nd 2010, 12:35pm)


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11,297

Tuesday, June 22nd 2010, 6:59pm

Quoted

Original von kOa_Master
das ist es also!

lol

r3.s1n

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11,299

Tuesday, June 22nd 2010, 10:01pm

Quoted

Original von r3.s1n
Nord-Korea 1:0 Brazil

Naja, am Ende merkt man, dass es wohl doch nur nen Fake ist. Ich hätte es ihnen aber zugetraut... :D

11,300

Wednesday, June 23rd 2010, 9:34am

hab gehört das 0-7 war das erste live übertragene Spiel in Nordkorea überhaupt. Wohl auch das letzte :D

Stein

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11,301

Wednesday, June 23rd 2010, 4:18pm

Zwei Männer im Supermarkt stoßen zusammen.



Meint der eine völlig aufgelöst:

"Entschuldige, aber ich bin total durcheinander, ich suche meine Frau!"



Darauf der andere: "Mir geht es auch so, seit 30 Minuten suche ich schon.

Wie sieht Deine denn aus?"



"Meine hat blonde lange Haare, ist 1,70 m groß, braungebrannt, vollbusig,

schlanke Figur, hat einen Mini an, ein weißes enges Top ohne BH und Schuhe

mit sehr hohen Absätzen. Und wie sieht Deine aus?"



"Scheiß drauf, wir suchen Deine!!"

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11,303

Wednesday, June 23rd 2010, 7:55pm

pervers

Stein

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11,305

Thursday, June 24th 2010, 10:39am


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11,306

Thursday, June 24th 2010, 11:06am

Quoted

Original von Imp_Akhorahil
http://web.orange.co.uk/article/quirkies…on_Hells_Angels
deutsche können richtig cool sein :D


hehe
die wollen im moment in die schlagzeilen kommen?
http://www.20min.ch/news/kreuz_und_quer/…fallen-15209765

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11,307

Thursday, June 24th 2010, 11:11am

Quoted

Original von Imp_Akhorahil
http://web.orange.co.uk/article/quirkies…on_Hells_Angels
deutsche können richtig cool sein :D

loool

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11,308

Thursday, June 24th 2010, 11:11am

OMG den Schweizer scheiss kann ja kein Mensch lesen, eine Töff-Gang? Hört sich fuer mich nach nem Schwulenclub an.

fast_boozo

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11,309

Thursday, June 24th 2010, 12:02pm

"Töfffahrer Töff-Gang" :respekt: muahahahahaaaaaa ich kann nicht mehr... best ever in diesem thread :D :D :D

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11,310

Thursday, June 24th 2010, 3:26pm